No Country for Old Women
|image = File:No_Country_For_Old_Women.jpg |season = 10 |number = 6 |overall = 228 |network = ABC-TV |airdate = May 1, 2018 |writer = Dave Caplan |director = Gail Mancuso |previous = Darlene v. David |next = Go Cubs }}No Country for Old Women is the 6th episode of Season 10 of Roseanne, also the 228th episode overall. Summary After Beverly gets kicked out of the nursing home, Roseanne and Jackie fight over who will take care of their mother. Meanwhile, Mark's creative touch with building a birdhouse for Dan's customer is more than Dan can handle, but Darlene defends her son. Plot In-Depth Jackie Harris is eating cereal when Roseanne Conner walks in and tells her that their mom sleepwalks. Their mom comes in and complains about her living situation. Dan mentions that Jackie's apartment is quieter but Jackie quickly shuts him up. Their mom asks if she can take her coffee to her room and they say that its fine. Roseanne asks Jackie to take her but Jackie says no she hates her. They argue about it and Jackie says that she'll take Darlene Conner Healy and the kids instead. They decide to split her and Roseanne gets her first. Mark Healy comes downstairs and sees Dan Conner sitting on the sofa. He asks Dan what he's doing. Dan tells him that he has a drywall project and also needs to make a birdhouse. Mark offers to help with the birdhouse and Dan agrees to make some instructions so that he can put it together. Roseanne, Darlene, Harris, and their friends are playing cards. Roseanne gets into an argument with her mom about how bossy she can be. Roseanne takes her mom to Jackies because her week is up. Jackie comes home after having been at the groceries for seven hours. Jackie tells her that there were long lines and she went to the DMV to renew her license early. Jackie's mom berates her about having a single chair in front of the television. Jackie says that some people just can't get the message that she doesn't want anyone else here. She says that she doesn't want to do this anymore that she's a certified life coach and that they are breaking this cycle right now. Her mom says that when she thinks of a life coach she thinks of someone who has a life. Mark shows Dan his finished birdhouse but it isn't exactly the way Dan pictured it. Dan says that he'll have to redo it in the morning. Darlene yells at him because she encourages Mark's creativity. Dan says that he got paid to do this job and that if he doesn't do it right he won't get hired again. Jackie wakes up to find her apartment has been reorganized. She goes to yell at her but can't find her in the apartment. Roseanne is on an Uber ride when Jackie climbs into her car. They are about to go looking for their Mom when they get a call from Becky Conner who tells them that their mom is at her apartment. Darlene tells Dan that Mark is really bummed because he's been in his room all day. Mark comes down and shows him a new birdhouse that he made. Dan says that his client will like it. Darlene tells Mark that it's okay to break the rules but not her rules. Becky arrives and tells Jackie and Roseanne that they have to do something about their mom. She's having sex in Becky's apartment with an old man. Becky says she's going to live at Roseanne's house until they get her out of there. Roseanne and Jackie head over to Becky's apartment. Roseanne and Jackie meet Beverly's boyfriend, Lou. Roseanne goes to take Lou back to the nursing home. Beverly tells the two of them that they have to decide who's going to take her because she can't be moving back and forth. Roseanne and Jackie argue over who'll keep their mom. Jackie goes back into the room to get Beverly and finds her trying to climb out of the window. Beverly tells her that she won't be happy until she's gone so she's leaving. She goes to climb out of the window when Jackie tells her that she loves her and that she doesn't want her to die. Jackie pulls her back in and Beverly asks why she stopped her. Jackie tells her because her life would be better with her than without her. Jackie offers to let Beverly stay with her permanently and Beverly asks what happens if they start arguing again. Jackie says that they're going to go to therapy. Dan asks Roseanne if she was really going to put Beverly into a county home. Roseanne is just glad that it didn't come to that. Jackie comes over and Roseanne hugs her thanking her for taking their mom. She promises to take Beverly at least once a month to give Jackie a break. Dan hugs Jackie too and tells her that she saved their lives. Jackie tells them that the therapist gave them a list of trigger words that they need to avoid. Roseanne asks which ones and Jackie says things like Hi, Hello, etc. Cast Starring *Roseanne Barr as Roseanne Conner *John Goodman as Dan Conner *Laurie Metcalf as Jackie Harris *Sara Gilbert as Darlene Conner *Lecy Goranson as Becky Conner *Michael Fishman as D.J. Conner (credit only) *Emma Kenney as Harris Healy *Ames McNamara as Mark Healy II *Jayden Rey as Mary Conner (credit only) Guests *Estelle Parsons as Beverly Harris *Natalie West as Crystal Anderson *Sandra Bernhard as Nancy Bartlett *Christopher Lloyd as Lou *Ethan Cohen as Nick Trivia *First appearance of Crystal Anderson and Nancy Bartlett in Season 10. *Although aired as the sixth episode of the season, it was filmed as the ninth and final episode of Season 10. *Despite being credited, Michael Fishman (D.J. Conner) and Jayden Rey (Mary Conner) do not appear. Quotes Category:Season 10 Episodes